Owning a Slave Just Isn't Hip

So, more on this Craig's List posting. In addition to getting a reply from R., my soul stalker... er I mean "mate," I got a reply from a guy offering to be my slave. He's a 25 year old jewish guy and seemed cute and normal enough from his picture. He just asked for the ability to do whatever I asked of him to make me happy. I could ask him to do anything from having him drive 40 miles to fetch my favorite tea at 3 a.m. to having him lie prostrate on my floor as my human toilet to cleaning my house in the "outfit of my choosing." I would not have to pay him; being a woman's slave is just something that he loves and has been doing since he was in high school.

I was too intrigued. I wrote him back to see if this guy was serious. He is. He says he lives to serve women and make them happy. I have to admit that I considered owning this young man. He says he's also a personal trainer and a masseur. It would be awfully useful to have a not bad looking, personal trainer, masseur, dry-cleaning fetcher, maid, errand runner at my beckon call. Hmmmm... I am looking for a man who lives to make me happy... Just kidding. I can't do this, but I have to admit I thought about it for a second or two. What if I don't call him a slave, but a really, really devoted friend? ;)